Hey Readers! I went AWOL! I didn't post my weight and blog entry during Halloween week. To be honest, that week was bloody awful. I don't know if it was Halloween or if I was just feeling rebellious. I was pretty following a see-food diet, I saw food... and I ate it.
The only good thing about the week of Halloween is that I didn't stop exercising. Not one day. But, I really wasn't feeling it. I didn't put my full effort into it. I felt like I was just going through the motions, even during my kettlebell class. I felt completely off my game.
And, what happened when I weighed myself last Saturday? Well, I really couldn't weigh myself that day. I ended up waking up at 5 am to do a Jillian DVD before heading to Mentor, OH to attend President Obama's campaign rally. That was amazing (I posted a pic or two on the photo album page). After that, I attended a Twilight party at my friend's house... and yes, I really did enjoy myself.
When I weighed myself on Sunday and I saw a three pound weight gain. I really wasn't surprised. To be honest, I've been feeling bored and dispondent. Not because of what I've accomplished, but because I feel like I take one step forward and two steps back. Just when I felt I got my appetite and cravings under control, my appetite went through the roof. I was hungry often. I wanted to eat everything. I wanted pizza, french fries, hamburgers, cake and candy. I felt like the "Old Me" was creeping back in and trying to take over. And, I admit I fell into some old habits. I ate candy... more than one serving of candy. I had cupcakes and pizza and waffles with REAL SYRUP.
Sunday was reality check time. I thought back to my week, and what I ate and didn't record. I also remembered that I didn't feel all that great after eating that food. I used to get such great enjoyment from food. It was my crutch and my therapist. My boyfriend and my confidant. Now... it's just FOOD, and I felt a little sick about my behavior.
So, instead of wallowing in a downward shame spiral, I wrote last week off as what it was, a temporary setback. I jumped in Jillian and Zumba on Sunday, and I hit my workouts this week with more vigour. It also helped that my metabolic class completely kicked my ass. Kettlebells were amazing. I jumped and shook in Zumba, and I really worked hard at home.
So, when Saturday came and I found that I lost all the weight that I gained (and a tiny bit more), it was time for personal reflection. Was Halloween week really worth it? Was all that food worth it? What did I get out of it? You know, I think maybe I needed to go through that crazy week. Maybe it was time for me to revisit how I used to be, and remember how I used to feel. I look at myself in the mirror and it's such a drastic change from where I used to be. It's shocking and wonderful... and scary too. I don't want to go back to how I used to be. I love who I am now. I'm happier and healthier. So, I fell off the wagon. You know, as long as I learned from that experience and moved on, Ain't Nothing Wrong With That.