Confessions of a Sugarholic

 It feels good to let my finger do the talking once again.  Hey readers.  I sure did take a leave of absence, didn't I?  I also feel I lost myself in the process.  After my mid-week meltdown, I've been doing a lot of self-reflection thinking about where I derailed.  It wasn't any event or circumstance that caused it.  It's really just plain old complacency and laziness, with a dash of arrogance.   Complacent. Webster defines complacent as "satisfied with how things are and not wanting to change them."  I'd say that was true.  I remember saying to myself over the last few months, "I'd be happy if I stay just how I am right now."  I don't think I truly believed that, but that was what I was telling myself.   Lazy, defined as "disinclined to activity or exertion : not energetic or vigorous."  I'd agree with that.  Sure, I still worked out more days during the week than not, but sometimes I wasn't feeling it

I know we've all experienced hardships that have truly tested us.  I've wondered what is that catalyst that causes one to make changes, hopefully for the better.  I'd like to think I've experienced a few of those moments of clarity.  Where everything seems so sharp, you can see it right in front of you.  You can touch it.  You want to make those changes, and create a better quality of life.  So you make that change.  You educate yourself, and make a plan.  You follow that plan to the tee, vary rarely deviate.  You start to see how the positive changes are impacting you.  It's working.  People notice the change.  You're pleased.  You're successful.  And you move forward, working toward you goals. And then one day it stops.  It all stops. You don't see the changes anymore.  You work so hard to keep the momentum going, and you continue to go nowhere. You fight so hard, and you hardly see any results.  You tell yourself to keep going, keep pushing.  An

It's been so long since I've done a blog post that I feel like I had re-learn the process.  Hello out there to any of you that are still hanging in there with me.  It's been one hell of a summer!  Some great things have happened... And some not so great things.  I felt like I had this weight thing beat.  I mean I'm cruising along.  I figuratively threw my scale out the window for the summer.  I'd focus on my eating and continue working out.  That was my plan.  And as you can tell from my moodie and post title, the best laid plans don't always come to fruition. I'm realizing as I look back on my summer that I got into some very poor habits.  I tried to quit the Jelly Bellies, but I'll be honest and say I didn't have my heart in it.  They are too good and too easily assessable.  And Jelly Bellies weren't the only thing I was eating.  I was loving up on my sweets.  Carbo-overloading and loving and hating every minute of it.   So, what do I ha

Long time no read, right?  I know.  I'm seriously absent and tardy from blogging.  I decided to take a much needed vacation from blogging (and a lot of other things).  Let me fill you in on what I've been up to since I've been away. In my last entry, I shared that I completed my first half marathon.  It was an amazing experience.  I'm so glad I did it, and I plan to do it again.  It was also mentally draining and physically exhausting.  After the marathon, I had two trips coming up - Minneapolis and Jamaica.  So, I decided to take a well deserved vacation from blogging.... and healthy eating. Yes, sir!  I was living la vida loca!  If I wanted it, I ate it.  I ate heaps of hot tamales and jelly bellies.  So much so that I'm surprised I didn't turn into either of those things.  It's funny how the candies I crave aren't loaded with fat. In fact, my favorites pride themselves on being fat free.  That's great, right?   Because I'm ingesting my c

Finish line... early before the race. Hey readers!  I'm actually surprised I'm doing this right now.  I thought I wouldn't have the energy to hold my head up, but it seems I've caught my second wind so I might as well get my thoughts down while they are still fresh in my head. Today was a big day for me.  A day that I thought would never come for me - considering where I was about a year and a half ago.  I did something I thought I'd never be able to do.  I completed a half marathon. I'm honestly having trouble putting words to my feelings right now.  I knew this day was coming.  I remember back on January 11th, when my trainer and workout partner convinced me to change my race registration from the 10K to the half.  At that time, I wasn't sure I would be able to do it.  Then, when I started training in February, I had the idea that I'd be able to finish under 2 hours 50 minutes.  Today, my goal was to finish under 3 hours.  I now realize even th

Hey readers!  Sorry for not posting last week.  Nothing was wrong.  I just didn't have anything profound to share, and I'm thinking that's not a bad thing.  I feel like my new lifestyle is taking hold and cementing into place, and sometimes I don't have much to report.  Or it could have been because I did my longest, long run as part of my 14 week training program for the Cleveland Half Marathon (TWO WEEKS FROM TODAY! YIKES!), and it completely tired me out.  10 miles.  I think it went well.  I felt like it would have been better if I had water available to drink though out.  I was quite dehydrated after finishing so I talked up on water to rehydrate. The half marathon has many water breaks so I feel I'll be okay.  Plus, when I finished I felt like I could still continue, and at that distance, I would only have 3 more miles left. I definitely feeling better about the Half. This past Saturday, I ran my first 5K and I finished in about 43 minutes. I'm not sure

Good day to all my readers and followers out there.  I hope you are all doing well.  I'm doing really good.  Another week down, and I'm still going strong.  It was a pretty productive week, and I finally feel like I've hit my stride.  Literally!  I've finally found my running pace. I've been paying a lot of attention over the past few weeks of how I've been feeling during my runs.  When I'm on the treadmill, the run is very short so I'm able to run short intervals at 5 mph and above (3-4 minute intervals).  I walk for 1-2 minutes.  I usually don't run for more than 55 minutes during the week. My long runs are on the weekend.  When I attempt the same pace (5 mph), I have a much harder time going the distance, and I think it's because I'm running for distance and not minutes, so I fizzle out pretty quick. This week, I tried something different. I took my run pace down to 4.7-4.8 mph and did a 3/2 interval (3 min run/2 min walk).  I was ab

Hello Readers!  I feel like I've done a complete 180 from last week.  It's amazing what a week of horrible eating and reflection can do for you. Last week I felt like I was standing on the edge of a precipice.  Directionless.  I wondered how did I get so distracted...so far off track.  I allowed these distraction to take control and move in a direction that I knew wasn't good for me.  I knew this.  I even asked myself while I was stuffing numerous hot tamales in my mouth, "What on earth are you doing to yourself?"  I used to ask myself this questions when I would binge.  I'd never answer the question though because I don't think I knew the answer to be quite honest. The difference this time around was that I stopped it.  I stopped the behavior.  I thought about why I was doing it.  I also thought about if the result of eating all that candy made me feel better.  It didn't.  It never made me feel better. Back then, it just made me feel numb, which

Hey everyone!  Sorry I didn't post last week.  I didn't have the best weekend, and I felt completely out of it.  I also fell off the wagon.  Not completely, but it was enough for a wake up call.  I've been doing a lot of self-analysis over the last week to figure out what my next step needs to be.  It was very humbling.   Over the last year or so, I've been on a journey to change my life and improve my health. I was tired of sitting on the sidelines watching others enjoy life and wishing I could be them.  I've talked about this before in prior posts.  I wasn't living.  I was tired of eating my emotions, and food just wasn't filling the void anymore.   So I got off my unmotivated, lazy behind and got to work.  I started tracking my calories, working out and researching.  I wanted to know what I could do to keep my metabolism burning and get the weight off.  I had plans for what I would do when I was successful and looked forward to getting those char

Hi everyone.  I was busy entertaining a high level VIP in my life so I wasn't able to post last week (wink).  I'm sure you guys missed me (yeah, right), so I'll get right down to it. My Whole 30 is over.  Monday, March 18th was my official last day.  Funny that I also had my physical that day at the doctor.  I had a fasting blood test, and I tried to get the results before posting, but I wasn't able to swing by the office and pick them up.  I'll make sure to include them next week. I'll admit I'm a bit anxious to find out what those results say about my diet changes.  I did notice a significant drop in my blood pressure.  I'm starting to keep track of it so I can provide my doctor with historical data.  That's probably the only way I'll be able to convince him that I'm ready to be weaned off.  Sadly, once you are on maintenance medication, you just can't stop it cold turkey.  It can dangerous, and I want to get rid of all that me

Hey everyone!  It's a beautiful day in NE Ohio.  I mean we are pushing 70 degrees here in Ashtabula.  The windows are open.  The sun is shining.  I'm Feeling Good .  Well, I am kind of feeling good.   I'm a bit sore. As you know, I'm training for the Cleveland Half Marathon on 5/19.  I'm planning on walk/running.  I hope to do a 5 minute run/1-2 minute walk interval hoping to finish before 2 hour 50 minutes.  I hold myself if I accomplish that goal, I'll get myself another Tiffany charm, and this one I'll get when I travel to NYC at the end of June.    Anyway, yesterday was my first outdoor run since last year.  Back then I was completing slow intervals, and the most I ran was 4 miles.  I usually finished 4 miles in one hour.  My training protocol has me running 3 times a week, Monday and Wednesday, with my long run on Saturday.  Right now, I'm practicing 3 min run/2 min walk, and I'm running at 5 mph and walking at 4 mph.  This past Saturday,

Hey Folks.  I hope you all had a good week.  Mine was quite terrific, and a hell of a lot easier than last week. Yes, I am still in the thick of my Whole30 program.  I'm at the half-way point now, and I'm amazed at how quickly it's passing.  I haven't had any slip ups as far as I know, and although I still have cravings for sugar/artificial sweetener, it hasn't been too hard to get over it.  In the end, it's best that I really leave those things alone. As I mentioned above, I had a pretty awesome week.  Energy is up.  Sleep is beyond amazing and really restful.  Everything is ticking along like clockwork.  I've started to notice some physical changes too. When I was heavier, I had a lot problems with fluid pooling in my ankles.  Fluid retention is a very serious medical condition, and mine was brought on by high blood pressure, obesity, and diabetes.  My left ankle would swell so badly that I would have trouble walking as my day progressed.  Eventually

Hey everyone.  Week one of the Whole30 Program is done, and I'm still alive.  I didn't die by eliminating added sugars, alcohol, grains, beans and whatnot from my diet.  But I will tell you one thing, this week was not easy.  Let me elaborate.The creators of the Whole9 state on their website that, "Whole9’s original program designed to change your life in 30 days. Think of it as a short-term nutritional reset, designed to help you restore a healthy metabolism, heal your digestive tract, calm systemic inflammation and put an end to unhealthy cravings, habits, and relationships with food."  In reading their book, I realized that I wasn't making the best choices for optimal mental and physical performance so I decided to give it a try.  I'm going to give you an idea of how my week went - feel free to skip through the days if you aren't interested. Sunday... I started.  It was fun playing in the kitchen and making some new dishes that were very healthy an

Hey Readers!  I hope you guys don't mind that I took a break last week.  I wasn't taking a vacation.  I had homework, research, and decisions to make.  Let me explain. I knew that losing weight by using calorie restriction would only get me so far.  Our bodies are very smart, and they adapt very quickly.  In my case, I have a tremendous amount of weight to lose.  So at the beginning, eating less and moving more was a no brainer.  The weight fell off quickly and steadily.  In that time, my body was most likely in shock thinking, "WTF does she think she's doing?  I can't keep up with what she's doing!"  But, eventually, it did. When your body adapts, the weight loss tends to taper off and stabilize - the dreaded plateaus.  I'm sure I would still be able to lose weight, but it would be slow-going and frustrating.  When this happens to a lot of people in my situation, they become despondent and start falling into dangerous old patterns, and eventuall